#3.3 Pass the Xanax : Dealing with Anxiety in a Blended Family

on Thu Jan 21 2021 11:33:29 GMT-0800 (Pacific Standard Time)

with Darren W Pulsipher, Paige Pulsipher,

Blended families bring lots of new stressors into a relationship. Anxiety is high and sometimes your attempts to help your family to blend just increases the anxiety for everyone. In this episode, Darren & Paige talk about causes of anxiety and how to deal with anxiety in your family.


Keywords

#blended #relationships


 
Blended families bring lots of new stressors into a relationship. Anxiety is high and sometimes your attempts to help your family to blend just increases the anxiety for everyone. In this episode, Darren & Paige talk about causes of anxiety and how to deal with anxiety in your family.

Finding the cause - It is right in your face.
  • Establishing a new family structure
    • new parent styles
    • different methods of discipline
    • different expectations of how children should behave
  • Steep learning curve
  • Co-Parenting with your Ex. 
  • Children become pawns in the broken relationship. Watch out for this.
  • Someone else is in the picture when you are raising your new family.
How to lessen the anxiety
  • It’s about testing what works and what doesn’t work while making sure that children feel safe and secure in the process.
  • Sit down and establish ground rules before your blend the families. Hard to do because you have on rose-colored glasses.
  •  Adults need to work hard to make everyone feel equal in the house.
  • 6 ideas to lessen the anxiety
    • Figure out a co-parenting plan with your spouse early on.
    • When you start to feel overwhelmed, take it one hurdle at a time.
    • See your family -- including the exes -- as a team.
    • Invest in a chore chart
    • Remind yourself to celebrate even the smallest of victories.
    • Whatever you do, don't aim for perfection.
Time and acceptance of your new reality.
  •  If you keep hoping for something outside of your control will change it will continue to increase the anxiety.
  •  Known when to hold them, know when to fold them, know when to walk away, and know when to run.
  •  Change your expectations. 
  •  Get over the one-sided parenting. It is okay to be the one that does not put the kids in the middle.
  •  Pick what is worth the anxiety. Let other things go.
  •  Get rid of the feeling that you need to "Win".



Articles.
- http://www.essentialkids.com.au/development-advice/development/the-anxiety-of-the-blended-family-20130227-2f542
- https://www.huffpost.com/entry/6-ways-to-handle-stress-_n_5002607
- https://www.huffpost.com/entry/the-ugly-truth-about-blended-families_b_589363b6e4b0b4d609210569
★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★
Podcast Transcript